Japanese Dude-Girl

Lurking in the Shadows

2011-04-08T18:28:00.000-07:00

I got to preview Insanely Twisted Shadow Planet, it is going to be awesome.

Joe had a bachelor party

2011-04-02T09:20:00.000-07:00

If you know anything about Joe you will know he likes the same things he did as a kid except those things are now just larger and louder than they once were.

It is true, we went to Pennsylvania we shot guns, we gambled money, and we rode around in very powerful all terrain vehicles.

Oh and I built that fire.

I rode out the Pennsylvania house, or as how it is usually refereed the Beaver Farm.

"What did you do for Joe's bachelor party?"

"Oh you know we went to the Beaver Farm."

"Nice!"

Joe and his brother Rob all rode together and it was almost surreal. I had been up to Beaver Farm many times as a kid, and even as an adult. But the last time Joe, Rob and myself where in a car going to the Beaver Farm? I would say that hasn't happen since maybe 8th grade. We chatted we reminisced, it was fun.

We played this song a lot on the ride.

We had fun! Our first stop was to a gun range in Pennsylvainna where you could shoot all kinds of interesting guns.

Here we see Joe with an M-1 Garand. I am pretty sure Joe is ignoring the man talking next to him.

Here is a picture of me with an M-16 with grenade launcher attachment. You could destroy a small town with that gun.

Here is a picture of me looking cool.

Even Hitler showed up!

After we did some shooting we went to Mount Airy Lodge, which now has a casino. Somehow I ended up in handcuffs by some girl dressed up like a cop. She wore high heels and I think her name was Vixen.

After our love of everything at "beautiful Mount Airy Lodge," we headed for our final destination, the Beaver Farm.

So you understand this is the everything store that is "down the road" from the house. This store has everything, or at least everything you are going to get in the middle of Pennsylvania.

This road goes two way, this way and that way.

This is the Polaris getting started for the first time that weekend.

This is me sitting in the Polaris in front of the house.

Frank sitting in the Polaris in front of the house.

This is the guys that went.

l-r Rob, Frank, Joe, Mike, Felix, and Chuck

Here are Rob, Joe and myself in the Polaris riding around the property.

Interview with Kevin from Barcade

2011-03-25T18:20:00.000-07:00

Unwinnable went to check out some behind the scenes at the new Barcade opening in Jersey City!

Revolution!

2011-02-28T18:10:00.000-08:00

I am very proud of the coverage this article got. This was a preview I did for the Splash Damage game Brink.

The Winter of No Content

2011-02-25T17:59:00.000-08:00

See what I did there?
Check out my thoughts on winter and how it can be harsh.

Time will never stop the strength of a warrior

2011-02-11T10:33:00.000-08:00

I watched a snail crawl along the edge of a straight razor. That's my dream.

2011-01-18T05:58:00.000-08:00

Best Games of 2010

2010-12-31T07:59:00.000-08:00

Again I contributed to this piece on what was best multiplayer game of the year. I chose Battlefield: Bad Company 2. I can't love it enough.
Best Multiplayer: Battlefield: Bad Company 2

It was just after dawn when we parachuted in.

The hot sun beats down and absorbs all of the moisture from the ground. Dust and dirt are unavoidable and sting my eyes. I reach for my C-4 charges and place them around the foundation of a forgotten structure. My squad mate, known only as The Spaniard, takes his position. After I set the explosives, I take a defensive position across the street. We are defending position on the map known as C.

My headset squeals with life. “You realize you’ve set these charges to the building I am using for cover, right?”

“Just being cautious, sit tight. We are going to have to destroy their options if we are going to keep this position.”

As we wait an armored troop transport filled with our guys rolls through towards position B. We only need to hold this position for a little while longer before we get our orders that we have stopped in insurgents.

My headset comes to life, it is The Spaniard again, “I am picking up tangos coming from position B moving into C. Spotting now. They should show up on your HUD.”

With motion sensors locally around my position no one will be sneaking up on me anytime soon. However I can’t say the same for my squad mate.

“Spaniard, you have two tangos going into the first floor of the building be advised.”
I can see insurgent troops move past a window on the first floor.

“I can hear them,” whispers The Spaniard, “they are coming up stairs. I can take them.”

From across the street I can see one of their soldiers looking out the window. He knows we are here. He knows we are close. Two figures now appear in the window. The Spaniard silently takes down the solider with his knife. I see a kill register on my HUD. Three more insurgents move into the building through the lower levels. Red dots fill the HUD now. They are on to him.

“Get out of there! Get out of there now. More soldiers are coming in on the first floor! I am going to blow the building!”

“Wait, I can get them. Don’t blow the building.” A few seconds pass. “OK, forget it they are on to me. I am out of here.”

I see a sand colored ghillie suit leap from the second story of the building. The Spaniard runs toward the clearing, as two more insurgents rush into the building, they don’t see him leave. No one ever has. I can see on my HUD all enemy troops are in the building. Two I can see from my vantage point are at the second floor and see The Spaniard move for cover.

I hit the detonator and the six pieces of strategically placed Compression 4 ignite like a symphony. The multi-floor explosion blows out the walls and what is left of the windows like snow. The building collapses onto itself leaving only rubble.

I have yet to have multiplayer experiences in other games like I do with Battlefield: Bad Company 2. The success of Battlefield: Bad Company 2 comes down to two words, “destructible environments.”

If you don’t have a destructible environment you might as well be playing a child’s game. I am looking at you Call of Duty, air strikes where building don’t fall down? Give me a break. I truly enjoy playing Halo: Reach multiplayer with work friends on a weekly basis. In its defense maybe the building are made of a space age polymer of the future that doesn’t ever get damaged. I guess the trees are made of that same stuff too.

If you want a combat experience that isn’t based on how many newbies you can pwn look no further than Battlefield: Bad Company 2, now featuring the Vietnam expansion pack. The choice is simple. BF: BC2, all day. (Charles Francis Moran VI)

Best in Music 2010 Unwinnable

2010-12-28T07:45:00.000-08:00

Unwinnable had a best in music 2010 piece. In between a bunch of music I could care less about I chimed with something I get get into.

Since their debut at SXSW this year, Off! has brought some life and breath back to punk rock. Staying true to form, OFF! has released several limited-run 7-inch EPs throughout the year. The first EP contained 4 songs and had a run time of just over 4 minutes. There is nothing faux under the hood of this monster.

The EPs have been collected in a boxed set called, predictably, First Four EPs, with cover art by Raymond Pettibon, the man who provided the iconic artwork for numerous Black Flag albums. He is in good company considering OFF! features Keith Morris, formerly of Black Flag and the Circle Jerks, on vocals. The rest of the band are veterans too: Dimitri Coats (Burning Brides) on guitar, Mario Rubalcaba on the drums (Earthless, Hot Snakes, Rocket From the Crypt) and Steven McDonald (Redd Kross) on bass. All in all OFF! is pretty awesome. (Charles Francis Moran VI)

Tron Off: A Great Day

2010-12-18T07:26:00.000-08:00

Ian and I went to Richie Knucklez Arcade out in Flemington, NJ to witness some world record that were to be broken, and to meet certified World Champion Billy Mitchell. It was an awesome time.

Play Dead, drop dead fun!

2010-12-14T07:22:00.000-08:00

I went and saw the live performance, Play Dead with my wife and wrote a review about it on Unwinnable. It was a great, show, and I can't recommend it enough.

Wallington, the land of adventure.

2010-12-10T05:47:00.000-08:00

Saturday afternoon I went to Wallington to visit my friend Shawn Dillon and Vic. Shawn and Vic live together, but not in a living in a sin kind of way.

I arrived at Shawn's house around 4 o'clock. I was there for about half an hour when Vic, Shawn's roommate appeared in the kitchen with some serious information.

"Let me tell you something. You gotta move your car. It's gonna be like the apocalypse here soon. If your parked on the street, your not leaving till after 9:30, at least."

Wow this was serious. I really don't know if I want to stay in Wallington that long.

I ask him what he is talking about. "Vic what are you talking about?"

"The Wallington fire engine parade. They will be closing off the surrounding roads in about half hour. You better move your car to East Rutherford. Come on, move your car. I'll give you a ride back here."

So I followed Vic a few blocks away an out of Wallington to the East Rutherford. None of the roads were to be closed off there.

On the way back to the house Vic told me about his experience moving a few years ago during the fire engine parade.

"I had this panel truck full of my stuff and here they are closing the roads all around the neighborhood. What was I gonna do? I had to drive the truck through the park to get home."

I really couldn't argue with this logic. However from the looks of it, Wallington just looked like regular ol' Wallington.

So Vic left and Shawn convinced me that it might be worth checking out the fire truck parade. It is hard to argue with surprise fun especially when it is in parade form.

So as it got closer to parade time, I did in fact see people setting up chairs and small groups of people gathering on the parade route. Perhaps this parade is larger than I am expecting.

Then like a switch the sun finally slipped into darkness and the public came to the streets.

One video is of Fire Trucks making noise, and the other video you can see Shawn Dillon dance and be merry.

All in all a very festive time.

Poker Night at the Inventory: 5 dollars of fun

2010-11-23T05:58:00.000-08:00

Well, at least I think it is fun to see Strong Bad, Max, Tycho, and The Heavy all sitting around playing cards. Dig my review on Unwinnable. News flash, I liked it.

Call of Duty: Undercover of the Night

2010-11-19T05:47:00.000-08:00

By adding a sense of realism to the the story, Call of Duty: Black Ops is a strong release for the Call of Duty franchise. Check out my review on Unwinnable.

I remember Halloween

2010-11-09T13:16:00.000-08:00

What did you do this Halloween season?

I went to a party at Hambone's house. That is always fun. I took a crappy picture of Shawn Orr in his awesome Costume of James Earl Cash from Rockstar Games Manhunt game.

Of course Shawn brought a real machete, and his attention to detail was pretty bad ass.

Tara and I dressed as the Bundy's, as in Al and Peg. It was easy and I have dressed up a lot over the years.

Saturday night we took off for Jersey City to the Harsimus Cemetery for some more Halloween fun. Turns out no one is getting buried at this cemetery anymore and the current residents there enjoy some Halloween entertainment.

The Lucinda crepe truck was brought in to make delicious crepes of which I know all to well from lunch time in the Exchange place area.

They served beer and other cocktails. I personally have never bought food and or drink in a cemetery before, it was quite the experience.

My friend Micki and his crew dressed as characters from the movie Blue Velvet. Here is Micki as Dean Stockwell's character Ben.

They also had some cover bands play.
Nothing says Halloween like R.E.M. and Neutral Milk Hotel cover bands, right?

I did get some footage of the Desendents cover band doing some pretty good covers of Hope, Sour Grapes, and Bikeage.

You would think that alone might have been enough fun and excitement for Halloween? Not really. The Tard train was boarded this time headed for Chiller Theater in Parsippany, NJ. No Halloween is complete without someone asking you, "Are you going to Chiller?"

Honestly the Chiller after party is where it is at, good times had by many. Look how much fun BTD, Ian, Matt, and Jumpkick are having.

Here is an awesome picture of me and John Wayne Gacey aka Pogo the Clown. This guy was spectacular, if I could I would hire him for my next birthday party.

Here is me and Pete Lang with Gorilla Darth Vader.

Of course there is always some good nightmare fuel at Chiller. I look surprised in this picture.

The best Vulcan Science officer, note the backwards ears.

Nothing says awesome like Lita Ford doing Kiss Me Deadly on a Saturday night.

All in all a great Halloween.

Magnificent 7 Lego: Great movie told through plastic

2010-11-08T09:43:00.001-08:00

While clicking around looking up scenes from the Magnificent 7 on YouTube. I stumbled upon this, a recreation of the Magnificent 7 done in Lego.

"Most folk are Lego around here, the dead guy was Playmobil."

Paranormal Activity 2: A Bad Movie

2010-11-08T07:05:00.000-08:00

Well not to give it away, but I certainly didn't love Paranormal Activity 2. However I made the best of but writing a review of it and gave it to fellow Unwinnable contributor Michael Sheridan to post on his movie website Tail Slate.

Mochimochi Land: The Killing Fields of cute

2010-11-01T05:46:00.000-07:00

Warning some images are so cute your brain might explode into candy.

So a few days before I got married I went to the opening for the Mochimochi Land exhibit in NYC. Mochimochi Land is made entirely of yarn, no electronics or gadgetry, just the brightly colored soft cord that wraps itself around your heart. All created by a single pair of hands whom govern this land, Anna Hrachovec of Brooklyn.

Here we see the Mochimochi Land worm rolling though all things adorable.

Do you knit? If you don't, I think you should learn how and make these things for me. Here we have a family of cute yarn creatures having a picnic on top of the Mochimochi Land mountains.

These purple fellas live in a swamp and eat unicorns, because they taste like candy. Notice the little tuft of tail sticking out of the guy on the right.

I am not knitter or one who knits, but I know there is some serious skill involved in the creation of these creatures. They are impossibly small. One might think only the hands of children could make these, but no, anyone can make them. Anna Hrachovec has unleashed her cute virus onto the world though her first book, Knitting Mochimochi: 20 Super-Cute Strange Designs for Knitted Amigurumi. Available on the Mochimochi Land website and on Amazon.

Anna will show you patterns on how to create your own adorable army of yarn.

Be sure to check out her site: Mochimochi Land

Her book makes a great Christmas present! Get it here on Amazon.

I would like to thank Stu Horvath for suggesting we get some culture and taking me to this event. Incidentally, Stu has his mother working like a Vietnamese Nike employee churning these little monsters out.

Medal of Honor: A handful of of ordinary lives

2010-10-27T05:41:00.000-07:00

This was a review I did for the new Medal of Honor. Read it on Unwinnable.

Get Lamp: a movie review.

2010-09-24T11:22:00.000-07:00

I reviewed the DVD documentary Get Lamp: The Text Adventure Documentary for Unwinnable. It is all about the genre text based computer games.

Show me how you smile: Break the 4th wall with me.

2010-09-15T14:05:00.000-07:00

Here is a piece I did about video games that break the 4th wall. Somehow I tie it in with my love of Magnum P.I.

I interviewed a gaming folk hero.

2010-08-30T08:00:00.000-07:00

I enjoy Team Fortress 2, so I sought out to meet and interview Jon "WiNGSPANTT" Tran on his Golden Wrench Charity for ChildsPlayCharity.org. He was a nice guy that likes calamari.

Aliens is the most important movie ever made.

2010-08-18T06:19:00.000-07:00

Without Aliens we wouldn't have Space Marines. I love space marines, more than I love cowboys.

I probably will never see that dead whale movie.

2010-08-12T09:26:00.000-07:00

However I did play Shoot 1up. It is super fun.

Check out Mommy's Best Games!

Fun times at the Pinball Museum

2010-08-05T09:34:00.000-07:00

This was a really fun time. We had fish and chips, really good lemonade, and lots of pinball. Silverball Pinball Museum in Asbury Park, New Jersey.

I found my first computer in the basement of the Alamo.

2010-07-30T09:20:00.000-07:00

Yes, it was a made out of adobe and Jell-O.

Your girl got dicked by Ricky Powell.

2010-07-26T05:52:00.001-07:00

I recently went to a gallery showing for Ricky Powell's silver anniversary for being a cartoon character/photographer. It was held at Gallery 58 in Jersey City, several blocks from where I work. I can do cultured things, life isn't just masturbation and video games.

I brought two friends, Brooke and Jumpkick, and we arrived when Ricky was in full swing doing part history lesson of the Lower East Side, and part stand up routine.

During a time when Andy Warhol, Jean-Michel Basquiat and Keith Haring were at the front of the pop art and street culture, Ricky had snapped some quality pictures. He gave a little blurb in between each picture.

All in all it was fun and cool, however Ricky Powell likes pussy more than anything else, which is understandable.

Me and LL Cool J.

I always thought Debi Mazar was super hot

Daryl Mac, D.M.C. yo!

Mortal Kombat on Broadway

2010-07-23T05:48:00.000-07:00

Mortal Kombat, during the Clinton administration, had a Broadway stage show.

Before Rock Band

2010-07-13T05:36:00.000-07:00

There was a time when rock bands and video games joined themselves together where playing the game was not is much a karaoke experience. Follow the link to more Unwinnable content.

A subject close to my heart

2010-07-08T19:20:00.000-07:00

This was my third contribution to Unwinnable and the first on the topic of Team Fortress 2. The Engineer update has finally come through.

Unwinnable now has a Steam group!

This is the story about a long and boring space adventure!

2010-06-29T19:04:00.000-07:00

I finally got around to finishing the first Mass Effect and found it to be very slow. This was my second contribution to Unwinnable. Yes, a review of a game that came out in 2007. It will be probably not till it it gets cold out will I play the highly acclaimed sequel.

Learning can be fun!

2010-06-22T18:27:00.000-07:00

This was my first article for Unwinnable. It is about a game where you can actually learn something. I hope to learn something by contributing content to this site. Exciting!

What did I learn from the Sony E3 Keynote?

2010-06-15T12:37:00.000-07:00

Sony has buttons, and buttons mean precision.

Sorcery is a game that you can play with the new Sony Wii like controller.

Heroes on the Move could be the new Super Smash Brothers for all I know.

There is some serious Coca Cola marketing here.

Probably the only company that talked about themselves as a company rather than showing games made by other people. Well done PlayStation.

The funny guy, Kevin Butler, from the Sony commercials is the only guy that seems to understand that funny is what people want.

Moving gamers, sitting gamers, we all pledge to one king, his name is Gaming forever he may reign.

Oh yeah, Gabe Newell showed up, he told me to buy a PS3.

What did I learn from the Nintendo E3 Keynote?

2010-06-15T09:14:00.000-07:00

Nintendo made a new Zelda game.

Nintendo made a Mario sports game.

Miyamoto used portal technology to arrive on stage.

Miyamoto won't shut up long enough to let Bill translate for him.

Watching grown men play Wii is embaressing.

Wifi and cellphones apparently give interference to the Wii.

They actually have a game coming out called Balance Boat.

Kid Icaraus returns, finally!

What did I learn from the Microsoft E3 Keynote?

2010-06-15T08:56:00.000-07:00

They are coming out with a new console, one that won't Red Ring, and it is wifi enabled.

Hideo Kojima doesn't know English very well, however I sure as shit don't speak Japanese.

There are a bevy of casual games coming to the Xbox 360.

This guy is a ultra douche.

The People at Valve speak a secret code!!

2010-06-09T20:50:00.000-07:00

The Team Fortress site has been updated:

Big things are happening RIGHT NOW at Valve. Things involving cultivated tree-fruit. BIG things. Things that rhyme with "grapple." Things that rhyme with "Speem Gortress zmavailable on the Babac."

Not today. But tomorrow. BIG THINGS. Stay tuned...

Like I have heard so many times in my life, "we'll see."

Making a Mortal Kombat movie with out the suck.

2010-06-09T07:34:00.000-07:00

There is no shortage of violence in video games. Violence in games that doesn't translate to the movie is weak. If you can butcher someone in a video game, I expect the movie to have the same level of gratuitous violence.

Long ago there was a movie called Mortal Kombat. That movie sucked, and more a kin to The Last Dragon.

This movie which is apparently a pitch to studios for a budget looks like it could be incredible. Yes that is Michael Jai White, and Jerri Ryan.

Looking at 9 "must haves" according to industry lists 6 months ago!

2010-06-09T05:29:00.000-07:00

Who doesn't love lists. The beginning of the year when you are told how your life will be incomplete with out these 50 or 100 games. Let's look briefly at 9 of these must haves 6 months in.

Actual great games of 2010 so far.

Battlefield: Bad Company 2

Shooter of the year.

Red Dead Redemption
Rockstar sandbox game. No brainer.

Super Street Fighter VI
Fixed some of the balance issues with some of the fighters and added some characters. None of this matters to me, I still suck at this game. I am sure these improvements could have all been done with updates and DLC, however you know how those SF fans are, they love their box art.

Some of the more quick burn fuse games of the mid 2010 gaming year.

Bioshock 2
Everyone says the same thing about Bioshock 2. "The first Bioshock was so good."

Splinter Cell : Conviction
Splinter Cell is the Dynasty Warriors of stealth gaming. There have been enough of these that Sam Fischer should be fighting robot vampires at this point.

God of War 3
Should this trilogy of games have been released and concluded on the PS2? Probably, by waiting so long risk losing the market for the game. All the people that really liked the first 2 God of War games already had a PS2.

Lego Harry Potter: Years 1-4
No one should ever be excited about a Lego game again, there for Harry Potter gets a nod. For the record Lego Harry Potter: Years 4-8 will have the exact same game play.

Not nearly as good as I hoped was going to be was Dark Void.

Kim Swift one of the lead designers on Portal left Valve to make Dark Void.

Like that girl on House MD that left so she could be in the new Star Trek movie for ten minutes. However those were an awesome ten minutes. Maybe they get paid at Valve on the same time schedule they put product out. I really wanted to like this game, however it didn't get me psyched enough. Repetitive is repetitive. Maybe that is why Portal was only 3 hours or so. Too short to get repetitive.

The hype for this game is killing me.

Lost Planet 2
Big monsters, shooting. Multiplayer. Shut it!

New iPhone announced

2010-06-08T05:49:00.000-07:00

No shit.

Also in related news AT&T is cutting their data plan service back.

AT&T Inc., the largest U.S. phone company, will cut wireless data-plan prices for most users next week and stop offering unlimited data plans to manage soaring demand for data-hungry devices like Apple Inc.’s iPhone.

Does Apple care about how their products are represented here in the country of orgin. Perhaps the iPhone has some kind of great sucess overseas in countires with less restrictve data plans.

Maybe Apple and AT&T never talk to each other. Like wierd parents that just stay together for the sake of the kids.

Sasha Grey wears a cute hat!

2010-06-04T11:29:00.000-07:00

I have seen this girl drink her own pee. I am also seeing her wear a cute hat.

If Steam comes to Linux?

2010-06-01T11:33:00.000-07:00

If Steam comes to Linux could it signal beginning of the, end for Windows as the gaming computer system?

We are in a time where people own more than one computer. People have net books, and use them for sitting on the couch, and bringing along with them instead of a book. They are bought preloaded with everything you could need from the store for about 300 dollars.

If you are a PC gamer you are buying a system, you are buying hardware, and it is generally expensive. Also it might not be your main computer, it might be in a game computer. Like Marty McFly said, "yeah we actually have two TVs." and they called Marty a liar, but it is true.

Logic dictates, if the OS is free, and the gamer can play the video games they want without the need of a product key from Microsoft by using Ubuntu why would you use Windows? It is a stretch but could happen.

Many years ago there were just as many home computer hardware companies as there were game console manufactures. Texas Instruments, Apple, Commodore, and IBM, were all in competition in making a place in the home PC market. Game publishers would release versions of games for each of these systems, some classic games like, Lode Runner, Oregon Trail, and Ultima. Some games were also released through Atarisoft, "your computer plays the arcade hits." I warn you once you hear this song you can never, "unhear" this song. These were the wild west days of the gaming industry. Maybe Steam can spearhead a revolution, and it will be in the form of a content delivery system.

Didn't care for killing bunnies: 5 sentence review of Red Dead Redemption

2010-05-18T17:26:00.000-07:00

This is my five sentence review on playing the first hour or Red Dead Redemption.

Well it sure is a brighter game.

It also answers the question, "Will there be some kind of forced vehicle that will have flight, like Assassins Creed 2 had?"

Where the motorcycles failed, for group riding, horseback riding with a group is a great improvement to the engine.

It is really fun to make your guy look cool while moving, something almost impossible in GTA4.

Didn't care for killing bunnies.

Cake is a lie for Mac users now.

2010-05-14T10:27:00.001-07:00

You are a Mac user, and you could care less about games, and more about productivity and style.

You are not known as a gaming system, and that is fine. I am sure there are some people that love playing the few games that are available for Mac, "Virtual Coffee Batista," and "Call of the Conscientious Objector: Modern Recycler."

All terrible jokes aside, big news. Not only is Steam, the god father of game deployment systems now available for Mac, the very Mac styled Portal is available for free right now.

FREE.

http://store.steampowered.com/freeportal/

All Valve related games are going to be relates for the Mac through Steam. I highly suggest you check it out.

Learning lessons from idiots

2010-05-10T15:37:00.000-07:00

I feel as though when video games do not have some sort of auto save, it is done to be spiteful. I do not need to learn lessons from a video game. Lessons can be learned from the subject matter, I don't want to learn any lessons from some game designer claiming his reasons for not including it are it shows some other failure of modern society, "because when we wanted a game saved we had to stop and make a conscious decision."

You know what? Fuck you, and your lesson plan. I don't need to be bullied around by some ass wipe with the best intentions for the final product in mind.

MY intentions! Mine! I am the final user! Not you, your commitment to pure is just unnecessary. You can not bring in so much new and so much that the consumer is just over loaded with everything being wonderful and perfect.

These excuses would never have been tolerated with innovation before.

We are not playing fuckin Rygar here. Enough of your snobbery to the genre. As a collective group we are the ones that brought you here, and be careful because these are the things that will take you off your pedestal. All of this has happened before and will happen again. Because you think no one is able to see the difference, I will tell you you underestimate people. You have no idea what we as consumers are capable of. You are the one I pity in the next life.

Are Achivments killing the "art" in video games?

2010-05-09T07:53:00.000-07:00

Games should be about having fun and making a personal experience, and connection. I pose this question. Is the social networking experience and achievements taking away from the artistry of the game?

If you read a book, you don't get a medal for it, you put in on the shelf and talk about it with friends. When you go to a museum and look at a painting you don't get a sticker for it, or a stamp like some kind of passport. No one stands there and tells you what to look at and what to look for. However when I went to the Prado in Spain I got a tour guide and it was very interesting. Critics tell you what you might want to look out for, and look past, at the end of the day the most important critic is you. You decide if the art work is worthy of an award or if it is an achievement.

Keeping track of stats and a win loss ratio is a very understandable records to keep. What is truly the purpose of the achievements, bragging rights? Say what you want about Call of Duty Modern Ware 2, but there are no multiplayer achievements to unlock. All of the achievements can be unlocked in the single player game, or the Spec-Ops game mode. All of the achievements are based how well you can play the game against the game not seeing how many people you can kill in a row with dual shotguns.

All that being said, I wonder if achievements are meant to keep people from lying.

"Did you beat Final Fantasy 7?"
"Yeah I beat that."

Did you really or did you just read the Wikipedia and watch the cut scenes on Youtube?

Oh Lordy what to do when the romance is gone!

2010-05-07T13:38:00.000-07:00

If you didn't think the iPad was Apples 500 dollar plus handhold gaming console you are wrong.

Satoru Iwata, the Nintendo president, is understood to have told his senior executives recently to regard the battle with Sony as a victory already won and to treat Apple, and its iPhone and iPad devices, as the “enemy of the future”

I really do love a good console war.

Valve steps up their game: Team Fortress statues

2010-05-04T13:31:00.001-07:00

A defining moment for a franchise comes when it transcends its original form into something else; an action figure is made, a statue or bust is cast, a movie tie in or a comic book. We embrace stories and characters when they go from one from to another, this is the truth this is what happens.

The first time I saw Hellboy merchandise besides a poster or a t-shirt, I thought there could be no better day. What is that feeling? Is it caused by a need of acceptance from peers with similar passions? The average Batman fan does not have to look far to be shown that what he is passionate about has been long accepted by those who make acceptance. Since I have been alive there has always been some kind of Batman toy.

Rather than waste time trying to figure out ways to market themselves, and exploit the consumer they only concentrate on the product itself. Since its release 119 updates have come out from Valve. Those 119 updates have all been free and have included everything from game fixes, new maps, new weapons, and novelty items. Once you buy the game there is nothing left to buy. Team Fortress 2 should be the standard model on how to support a game and community.

Valve has licensed its characters to be released as statues. Starting first not with Gordon Freeman, the nexus for all things Valve, but with very charismatic Heavy, from its successful Team Fortress 2 game. With their stylized looks these characters more than almost any other have been crying out to be moved to the next level.

Team Fortress has grown so much over the years, starting from very humble beginnings as a mod for Quake, an moving all the way to being a one of the four corner stones in the church of PC gaming. That community now has something to put on their desk that is made with the same level of quality that the original product was made, a 229 dollar resin sculpture of The Heavy.

Gaming Heads

Montclair Station stops serving coffee

2010-04-26T08:21:00.000-07:00

Sometimes things matter. People putting in a little bit of effort to do something good and that good gets appreciated. Something that might help the community. Something that sends a positive message that can be related to many people. Something like selling coffee on the train platform.

I can't tell you how excited I was when the restaurant located at the train station decided that they would sell coffee. I would much rather go to them than to the Dunkin Donuts or the Starbucks in the morning. The convenience of it, I get to help out a local business; it's good for me, it's good for them. Heck when I went to the restaurant during regular hours the man who sold me coffee recognized me and pulled out my chair for me when I came to show my support of the establishment.

This is how my customer support is appreciated.

They might want to try and let those customers that did support them down a little less hard on a rainy Monday morning when there were plenty of people wanting a delicious hot beverage. Perhaps slightly less passive aggressive too.

Going to see Toxic Holocaust tonight!

2010-04-23T08:05:00.001-07:00

I know it says Municipal Waste, but I like Toxic Holocaust better.

Stronger than all

2010-04-23T05:50:00.001-07:00

Submitted by Chuck Nasty

One of my favorite sites.

Godzilla Haiku

Fortune cookie Godzilla

2010-03-17T08:14:00.000-07:00

I love this site.

I am submitting one today.

Godzilla Haiku

The white fence and the whale.

2010-02-19T07:08:00.000-08:00

The water was very cold, the road with the white fence matched the shoreline of the lake. The lake was large, dark and deep. There was some old snow on the ground.

A ship is there, capsized half sunk in the water. There is a way into and out of the ship, but only underneath. Like an overturned canoe.

I know the person trapped in the airspace beneath the water and the hull.

I was driving in a car, with someone. We discussed the half sunk ship.
Then an Orca breached the surface and showed me his eye. The whale looked at me.

The whale dipped beneath the surface and slammed hard into the half sunk ship. It made a loud noise. The ship started to sink. I began to panic. I knew my friend was dead. I woke up.

Somewhere out there something happened

2010-01-25T07:23:00.000-08:00

We stopped updating completely, there was new jobs, there were some life changing events, and well I would like to think that I might be able to get back on track with all things that I think are great.

That being said I would like to commit to some more writing. A friend of mine said, "I think everyone should write." There is no hate in that.

So lets get back on the horse and try not to collapse it under the weight of awesome.

Thanks for playing.

Chuck.

P.S. There will be no New York Comic Con video this year. I am getting married that weekend.

Hey bro, Kojima still "crazy"

2009-06-03T07:41:00.000-07:00

According to resident Kojima fanboy Jose Santos, Hideo Kojima is, "still crazy."

Recently Jose was seen on this brand new Triumph Bonneville. "You know the kind that Snake uses in Metal Gear 4."

We asked Jose what he thought of Kojima lack of ability to come up with characters and story line.

"Listen I am from a poor village in Spain. My father taught me to fish and my sisters taught me how to dress. We used to go to the movies in a cart. These days I can't be bothers with video games I need new tires for my motorcycles so I can look more like Steve Mac Queen. He was a real man. Oh Kojima? He is still crazy."

Son of God to appear with Kojima on Konami panel at noon today!

2009-06-03T07:29:00.000-07:00

I roll my eyes now at even the mention of Hideo Kojimas name now. I never thought I would say that but seriously who the fuck cares?

So far...

MGS: Rising Raiden based game for Xbox 360

MGS: Peace Walker a Big Boss based game for the PSP

Can Kojima make games that are not in the MGS universe?

We hate organized religion! Assassins Creed 2

2009-06-02T12:26:00.000-07:00

I never finished the first one, however I plan to now.

So there are some new things for the Xbox Experience

2009-06-02T11:18:00.000-07:00

I can't afford air travel, but in reality you just want the skinny.

Today from the E3 stage in Los Angeles, Microsoft announced plans to dramatically improve their HD video offering through a new technology that enables instant on 1080p streaming with 5.1 audio with Zune video on Xbox 360.

This implementation is as close to a "disc in the drive" experience as possible over the Internet. At a high-level, here is how it works:

* Video startup is nearly instantaneous because of the back-end proprietary Microsoft technology developed by Zune that seamlessly transitions between many different bitrates and resolutions of video.
* Video playback will start at a low bitrate for fast download time and then ramp up to a higher bitrate and quality, up to 1080p with 5.1 audio.
* Features such as smooth fast forward and rewind that users have only seen before with local physical media.

It doesn't stop there. Other news coming out of E3 for Xbox LIVE Video Marketplace:

* Social: We unveiled Movie Party, a feature where you can go to the movies with your friends whether you are sitting on the same couch or in living rooms across the country. Starting this year, you can share a virtual theater, see your Avatars (a virtual you) on the screen – all while you listen to each other laugh and cry together at the movie through voice chat on Xbox LIVE.
* New Regional Partners: Now, for the first time Xbox LIVE members in the UK and Ireland can watch live or on-demand TV with BSkyB on Xbox. Never miss a moment of your favorite live TV shows, sports, movies and family-friendly entertainment – even share your favorites with up to seven friends in an Xbox LIVE Party.
* Global Expansion: The 1080p streaming HD Zune video experience on Xbox LIVE marketplace is expanding to 10 new regions this year, making movies and TV shows available in 18 total countries including US, Canada, UK, Ireland, France, Germany, Italy, Spain, Denmark, Finland, Norway, Sweden, Netherlands, Belgium, Switzerland, Austria, Australia, and New Zealand. (Note: content and partners vary by region)

Engadget can afford to go to E3

Team Ninja making a Metroid game.

2009-06-02T11:03:00.000-07:00

Team Ninja is making a game for the Wii.

I wonder if there will be any fan service shower scenes.

Ok I will eat my hat now

2009-06-01T12:26:00.000-07:00

This looks awesome!

Daylight fights? Check.
Giant redneck tank in overalls? Check.
Chainsaw? Check?

Chances of not having unlimted ammo for handguns?

Best game title ever

2009-06-01T11:32:00.000-07:00

Coming this fall. Enough said. Has anyone finished The Lost and Damned yet?

I will believe it when I see it...

2009-06-01T11:22:00.000-07:00

I highly doubt this game will be out on November 17th of this year.

I have heard real melee weapons, chainsaws and axes. I also heard New Orleans.

Once again I will bet a dollar that this game will not be out this year.

hmmm....

I believe in Jack Black

2009-06-01T09:52:00.001-07:00

I believe in Jack Black and I believe in Tim Schaffer.

I hold these truths to be self evident. Rock and roll and heavy metal are an important force and should not be tampered with.

Here is a nice clip from the upcoming Brutal Legend.

QTE!

2009-05-30T07:37:00.000-07:00

Best IM conversation ever.

(2:01:19 AM) charlesfrancisvi: did you see Terminator?

(2:01:23 AM) George Collazo: no
(2:01:26 AM) George Collazo: and i dont want to
(2:01:31 AM) George Collazo: ATTACK

(2:01:46 AM) charlesfrancisvi: wow

(2:02:04 AM) charlesfrancisvi: i made one sentence

(2:02:17 AM) George Collazo: nice defense
(2:02:22 AM) George Collazo: passive resistance

(2:02:37 AM) charlesfrancisvi: ok you are funny

(2:02:45 AM) George Collazo: deflection attack, Yo Momma

(2:03:27 AM) charlesfrancisvi: figured you would say no anyway
(2:04:11 AM) charlesfrancisvi: what happened with the show?

(2:04:35 AM) George Collazo: QUICK TIME EVENT.... X you Y lick X nuts X for A profit

(2:07:10 AM) George Collazo: dood that was awesome

Eric Lang the bad ass angry guy from Lost

2009-05-16T09:43:00.000-07:00

This guy should play Gordon Freeman if there ever was to be a Half-Life movie. He plays nerdy scientist well, and also is comfortable holding a gun and doing action things.

Ok maybe it is because he has a beard and glasses.

Is Electric Youth powering these giant beasts?

2009-05-12T09:53:00.001-07:00

This might be the best movie ever made.

Movie Trailers - Movies Blog

Deborah Gibson and Lorenzo Lamas.

Coming to a scifi channel near you.

Mega Shark vs. Giant Octopus

Bad spelling be damned!

2009-05-11T11:13:00.000-07:00

So if you say Thiaf out loud, it sounds like you might from bayou country. However that is how it appears on the Edios site, sorta. Thi4f.

Whatever, you know what it means, it means there will be a fourth installment to the "really awesome" Thief series. One of the few game series that would really and truly make a cool movie.

In other Eidos news Deus Ex 3 is in development as well. I guess that since JC Dentons' appearance in Capcoms Resident Evil 5 as Albert Wesker.

Really I am not making it up!

Bea Arthur, Dom DeLuise and Penny Flame

2009-05-05T13:43:00.000-07:00

Wow! what a week it has been first Bea Arthur and today Dom DeLuise and early this week Penny Flame has retired from the Adult Industry. This comes as sad news to me because she is one of the few members of the adult community that seems to have some natural comedic timing.

Penny is now known as Jennie and writing about her transition from one life to another on her blog BecomingJennie.

James Gunn hates you!

2009-04-30T07:38:00.000-07:00

James Gunn loves you, but he is mad at Xbox Live. Accroding to reports on his blog, James had filmed original content for an Xbox Live series called Horror Meets Comedy. The name of the piece was called Humanzee. The rules form Xboxlive for the directors were to keep it PG-13 with no sex.

"Microsoft/XBox was by far the most dreadful, non-talent friendly company I’ve ever worked for"

Sadly it is unknown at this time if the Humanzee will see the light of day, considering they did not approve of the content. We need not remind everyone that video games and systems are not only purchased and used by children, but by adults too.

Be sure to check out James' newest PG PORN title, High Poon, starring the amazing Belladonna.

British people don't know things

2009-04-30T06:57:00.000-07:00

According to a recent report from Telegraph.co.uk some of "Britain's firemen are being equipped with Star Wars-style headgear to make their job safe."

I am all for safety, I am the safest guy I know, however, these certainly don't look like anything from Star Wars. If anything they look like the guard helmets from THX 1138, that other movie George Lucas directed which he is constantly reminding us of the fact that he made by name dropping it everything he is mildly involved with. He is like George Foreman naming his brood when it comes to the usage of that alpha numeric identity.

Scare Force Won!

2009-04-28T12:30:00.000-07:00

Onlookers shit their pants yesterday morning in Jersey City, when a low flying Air Force One flew over head with an F-16 escort. According to reports no local officials had been notified of the fly by, which apparently was for a photo-op of Air Force One.

Sounds more like an experiment in crowd psychology than a break down of communication. Never forget the government will always think they are smarter then you.

So Shocking

2009-04-24T09:17:00.000-07:00

Twenty years after the release of Nothing Shocking it is now available through the Harmonix Rock Band Music Store.

A million years ago I went to see Jane's Addiction on the reunion tour. I had a feigning interest in the band mostly because the girl I had been involved with had a crazy thing for Perry Farrell. That show was sold out in like 5 min. I spent one hundred and twenty five dollars on a single ticket. We probably had some sort of awkward sex after the show.

So like many little rules I have in my life they are based on only one instance. Don't trust girls that like sports, don't trust girls that play pool, and now we can add one more, don't ever think that Janes Addiction is music for boys.

Another reason to get the Batman game..

2009-04-23T12:21:00.000-07:00

Not that the cool special edition with a batarang and stand, isn't reason enough to want this game.

Perhaps the new look for Harley Quinn will sway your thoughts.

Lets hope this game lives up to the hype. I've got my eye on you Ghostbusters.

No one likes a quitter!

2009-04-23T10:39:00.000-07:00

My Stop Smoking Coach with Alan Carr is a real DS application. These DS apps are starting to get out of control; yoga, weight loss, learning a language, and now quitting smoking.

Sir Anthony Hopkins give it a a rave review, "It was such a revolution that instantly I was free from my addiction."

Awesome Tony! Good for you!

This game is rated E, apparently 5 year olds need to quit smoking.

Game looks kind of incomplete. I'll wait for the patch.

His name is Chuck

2009-04-22T10:13:00.000-07:00

There couldn't be a better name for the hero of the Capcom sequel to the brilliant but tragically flawed Dead Rising. His name is Chuck Greene, and from the looks of it, he is ready to rock you.

In case you haven't seen it here is the strange Dead Rising 2 trailer.

Adult Star Marilyn Chambers found dead.

2009-04-15T08:30:00.001-07:00

Marilyn Chambers dies at age 56. She was found shortly before her 57th birthday by her 17 year old daughter. How terrible. There are no details to the cause of death.

Having started in “Behind the Greed Door,” which is usually said in the same breath as, “Deep Throat,” and “The Devil in Miss Jones,” Marilyn established herself as an icon of the first wave of modern pornography.

These early films were the first XXX movies on laser disc and betamax cassette, for much of suburban America this was their first exposure to pornography. In a time before the internet, and porn valley mass production, it was edgy and risqué to have an adult movies in your collection. Over the years these tapes and laser discs ended up in unmarked cardboard boxes in basements with their over sized cracked plastic cases showed wear and tear, however the ideas are still remain the same.

What does this mean to the average twitchy porn aficionado? Not much, considering we are in a time in a time where a girl might be in 150 productions in one year, Marilyn Chambers made her mark in one or two “high profile,” films and that established her as a star. She could probably be considered the first crossover star having been in a David Cronenberg zombie movie called Rabid, which I have never seen, but will probably netfilx this week.

Link to New York Times obituary.

Thoughts on goals

2009-04-08T07:23:00.000-07:00

So you need goals. You need something to strive for, something to look forward to. Without goals what is there?
It is a simple concept, sometimes difficult to grasp.

I now live with my girlfriend, whom I do love. This is true, she is nice, and pretty, and she likes me for who I am. It doesn't much better than that.

So now we live together.

A goal achived.

It is possible that I can only achieve goals with help of others?

Everyone needs someone to want them to cheer for them.

Sometimes people cheer you on because you want them too.
Sometimes you can't get it done if pride isn't on the line.

We are going to work on somethings.

You have a goal.

You even has a means to achive it to a certian extent.

Make love to your goal, make it your passion, your drive your, sex, your fuffilment to an idea. That passion that desire it what should push you forwatrd.

No matter it is.

You can still grow, There is still much to learn.

The Behemoth once again shows the depth of 2 dimensions.

2009-03-17T10:05:00.000-07:00

Well then, isn't this epic looking. However why is it going to take till 2010?

The Behemoth - Game #3 Trailer from The Behemoth on Vimeo.

Precious moments at Comic- Con

2009-02-12T07:46:00.000-08:00

La-la-la.

Unforeseen Consequences

2008-12-01T04:17:00.000-08:00

The first name for me in online gaming is Steam. Steam being the game deployment system introduced by Valve created in order to help get games into the hands of gamers quickly and combat piracy. I hated it at first, however now, I really like it. It's smooth, it is good, not my point however. My point is there is lots of fun and free a stuff on Steam. If you have Half Life 2, you ought consider some of the current game mods as well as what is coming to the future.

Current important title of the moment right now is, Left 4 Dead the zombie shooter. I haven't played it yet, this seems to be Valves' most hyped game to date. With Valves' high quality and production the FPS genre as a whole tends to change with almost every release.

Counter-Strike was a mod too before it was a purchase product. This game was hugely successful with a rabid online following. Many say that Counter-Strike 1.6 is the finest version of Counter Strike. Some online players still play 1.6 considering this version to be the games' finest form.

Counter-Strike however was based on something too. The game mechanics were a mod Team Fortress, which was a mod included with the original Half-Life. However that game was spawned from an early mod of Quake, known as Quake Team Fortress. This game first presented players 2 player team combat with what are considered standard character choices in online FPS.

So where does Left 4 Dead come from? Based on free mod Zombie Panic, this multiplayer challenge introduces survivor vs zombie game play which means new multiplayer game rules and tactics. The mod was originally made for Half-Life 1, and has now been made for the Half-Life 2 engine called Zombie Panic: Source.

Zombie Panic: Source won several players choice awards for mod of the year and was featured in the March 2007 issue of PC Gamer. Frantic game play The following is a 7 min short on how the game is played. Watch out for Whitey!

What else is there? What else is interesting? What was ten years ago last month, besides a younger more spry and full of hope Charles Francis Nasty? Believe it or not Half-Life was first released to PC, way back in November of 1998. A lot has happened in 10 years. To show the change, go back and play Half-Life: Source. The physics is there, but the graphics quite dated in comparison to todays' standards.

So what are we getting hopefully early next year? Blackmesa: Source, which is a total reskinning of Half-Life: Source.
Making it look nicer. Honestly, the game is brilliant and I think what they have done looks amazing.

So this is pretty much how last week went down for me.

2008-11-23T13:50:00.001-08:00

Pretty spot on.

Looking back at NYCC 08.

2008-11-16T16:39:00.000-08:00

The righteous always know what is right, right?

Me being annoying at the Comic Con of '08.

2008-10-28T08:59:00.001-07:00

Waxing the nostalgic with Johnny X.

A Short Interview with Johnny X from liabungalo on Vimeo.

Podcast with Life In a Bungalo

2008-10-28T08:56:00.000-07:00

I annoyed the crap out of George Bungalo for about an hour the other day when we made a new podcast. It was edited heavily thankfully cause I was hopped up on coffee.

Check it out here!

http://lifeinabungalo.com/2008/10/26/radio-bungalo-38-new-gnr-metallica-rocks-shackshakers-at-mercury-lounge-and-sasha-grey/

Danger Dudes take on Matt Hazzard!

2008-10-28T08:11:00.000-07:00

Duke Nukem
Commander Keen
B.J. Blazkowicz

These names strike a tender chord with gamers of another time. A time of shareware and buying game really cheap at Radio Shack. A coming of age of video games, of these characters some when onto great things and some faded into obscurity. Some of these characters are forgotten and some will live forever.

Matt Hazard is not to be forgotten or taken lightly.

With a return to current consoles Matt Hazard is really to blow you to 8 bits with fire power, gusto and voice talent from Neil Patrick Harris. NPH, most recently seen on Intenets' Dr. Horrible, as the main protagonist.

Will Arnett is also lending his talents to the classic game series as well. Arnett, most recently seen in the hospital with his recently born son and that lady who is not Tina Fey from Saturday Night Live.

Be sure to check out the Matt Hazzard websites!

www.matthazardofficialunofficial.com

www.doyouremembermatthazard.com

What do you know about the Wastlend?

2008-10-28T07:35:00.001-07:00

Well a long time ago when disks were actually floppy, there was a game called Wasteland. This game started it all.

Wasteland was a post apocalyptic adventure set in the deserts of Las Vegas. It was awesome, it had really bad graphics and a a really awesome story.

EA knew how to make a game back then. I mean they do now, but more in that zombie cancerous borg kind of way of just absorbing things that are of your interest. But whatever we all have an EA games somewhere in our collection.

After the awesomeness of Wasteland came a "sequel" of sorts. This game was called Fountain of Dreams. This game took place in the sticky heat of Florida. Mutation and crocodiles, good times.

Two dimensions, little icons, dark humor, and explosively graphic dialogue were how these games were played. All of this was carried over to the Fallout series, which is for argument sake the sequels to these games. So get ready to play Fallout 3, but first learn about Fallout 1 and 2.

Big Girl in the House

2008-10-28T06:25:00.000-07:00

Chung Li, not a dainty girl. Ok she has legs like a piano. Here is a new Street Fighter VI poster, showing off Chung Li's crushing thighs.

We also how the official movie poster of the the new movie Street Fighter: The Legend of Chung Li. Big blue mama will be played by the Canadian born half Chinese, half something white Kristin Kreuk. She is hot, and I think is wearing blue contacts.

Also in the printed media this month is Olivia Munn from that show on that channel that used have other shows besides crap almost all the time. She too is half AZN and half something else to make a hot hybrid. This is her from a recent photoshoot from Complex magazine.

Street Fighter VI is coming to consoles soon and is in high end arcades now. New Street Fighter movie will be out some time next year. Complex is on newsstands now!

Holy Crap! So Many Games! So Little Time!

2008-10-17T11:43:00.000-07:00

This fall has been an explosion of games.

Six of the shortest no bullshit reviews ever..

Mercenaries 2. Part of me wants to love this game, most of me hates this game. A blowemup with not enough polish to make this game worth while. Uninspired maps, and terrain. Not at all worth the 60 dollar price tag, if you bought this new you don't know how to buy games. Used only, and only if you are desperate for something.

Star Wars Force Unleashed. I liked this game, it was fun and easy if you played it on easy. This game was meant for everyone. It was a casual action game, for the casual gamer, casually.
If you are not going to buy it now for price, definitely get once the at 60 dollars it is a bit steep, borrow this game, or buy used, you won't feel cheated if you pay full price.

Lego Batman. The best game of the recent Lego games. It is better than Star Wars simply because it is more realized in the puzzle solving and the it actually has some challenging elements which add to what was becoming stale game play. Really Indiana Jones was super cute, but got a little boring after awhile. With Lego Batman feel confident at a full price purchase.

Silent Hill 5. It finally got the bad taste of Silent Hill 3 out of my mouth. A good compliment to the series, and what should have been the sequel to the flawless Silent Hill 2. It is a horror game, so get it during the Halloween it is going to cost you. I think 60 bucks is a bit of a stretch for this game, but I certainly think it is worth he first used price you find for it.

Saints Row 2. A fun blowemup game. Yes there is some kind of comparison to GTA, but this game does not take it self nearly as seriously as Rockstars Flagship franchise. Cartoon levels of violence and character customization makes this game very entertaining. With cheat codes that can make you 20 feet tall, it is bound to be fun. Oh and it has a chain gun, demo packs and airplanes, three things that do not appear in GTA 4. If you have finished GTA 4 and really like sandbox games with the driving and the killing, be sure to check this out. New or used you should be satisfied.

Fallout 3. This was something I thought was never going to happen. Fallout 3. Fallout 3 is awesome. The combat system is something that will change the FPS RPG, forever. There is nothing like it on the market today. A great story and interface makes for a truly immersible gaming experience.

Baby get my fingers out of your mouth.

2008-10-17T08:03:00.000-07:00

A very attractive, well put together eastern European woman has a baby.

That baby wants to eat me.

I'm sure he'd start with my fingers. Tearing away at my callused epidermis; gnawing the bones and sucking them dry.

Don't let ears of his little brown bear hoodie pull at your heart strings.

This baby is a monster, and is trying to eat me.

NHL 09, excitement from Dave!

2008-09-26T06:37:00.001-07:00

Our friend Dave likes 3 things in this world. He like boobs, sandwiches, and hockey. Sports games aren't just for jocks.

NHL 09 Review

If you were a fan of last year’s game, then there is no doubt that this years game will blow your balls off. NHL 09 is bigger and it’s hard to think that after NHL 08 EA could step it up for 2009, but wait for it….they did. Wow. Excited? Yes. Maybe? Yes. Read on.

First off the home screen is a great addition to the blue abyss that whored it self all over 08’, not to say it bothered me but the flawless animations that transition you from screen to screen in 09’ accompanied by photos and graphics are well received on my end. The menu system is unchanged since last year so navigation is very easy.

The features that they introduced this year surpassed anything I could have wanted or anything I would have thought of. “Be A Pro” mode, which allows you to create yourself (or play as a established NHL star if you’re a pussy), or someone who looks slightly like you, pick your gear and your subsidiary AHL team to play on. They drop you in as a 3rd line player and your goal is to ascend the ranks and ultimately join your NHL brethren and repeat until you are considered a hockey legend.

The be a pro mode is challenging only allowing you to control you, therefore if you are out of position and a goal is scored against you, you’re gonna hear about it from the coach. After each shift/game, you are graded and essentially given experience points to use to level up anything from aggressiveness to awareness. But don’t get to sure of yourself, for what ever position you choose to play be it a wing, center, defender or even the goalie, you are given expectations to meet in order to succeed. So with intense AI learning, and getting comfortable skating by yourself, gaining experience points can be slow. The bars are raised by increments so small that at first I didn’t know I actually increased anything.

With the be a pro mode, prepare for the long haul of becoming a legend, its going to take a while. Look for this feature to spring up in all of next year’s EA sport games such as Madden and NBA Live. Other features include a revamped media HUB that allows you to customize your team’s goal music as well as the game music. So if you really want to create an authentic game, load up your team’s goal music into the USB port, upload and assign to the team. Now each time you score you can play whatever you want! Nothing says goal like “I Cum Blood” by Cannibal Corpse, great goal guys!!

Another great addition that's been added is allowing you to create highlight reels of your favorite goals and plays to be saved for later viewing. Thus allowing every douche bag with a YouTube account to upload their “amazing goal of the year” to be played in Super. Slow. Mode.

The last upgrade I want to talk about is the revamped checking engine. In NHL 08’ nothing was more frustrating then squaring off they opponent for a huge hit only to bounce off them as they skate by worry free. So for 09’ the hitting engine is more realistic and REALLY responsive. Players react different according to how and where you hit them on their bodies. There is spinning, flipping, diving and sometimes it almost looks like you have killed them as their bodies go limp and crumble to the ice. Its one of the most rewarding aspects to 09’ that I believe really makes the games that much more fun.

My hats off to you EA, So in conclusion NHL 09’ kicks ass.
Grade: A Verdict: Buy it/ Trade in 08’

This movie might actually be good.

2008-09-26T06:31:00.000-07:00

Max Payne, despite sounding like N.W.O. era bad guy, Max Payne will bring plenty of noir to this Samhaim season. I really like the Danzigesque black winged angels.

Here the company has decided to rather than just release another trailer we would get a little back story on things to be expected in the movie.

Nevermind God of War 3.

2008-09-11T08:42:00.000-07:00
My reason to get PS3 is here now.

More bad than bad ass. Mercenaries 2!

2008-09-11T08:29:00.000-07:00

A 3rd rate 3rd person action blowemup game released on the PS3, Xbox 360, and the PS2. Here is our friend Dave with a review on Mercenaries 2.

I played the Mercs 2 and was pretty disappointed. Don’t get me wrong the game is fun, but it didn’t suck me in at all. The details were sub-par, the animations were decent, and the graphics in my opinion were un-acceptable, especially on this generation of console. Enemy AI is so far the worst I have seen; in a shoot out I was able to run right up to a group of bad dudes, run around them, take what ammo and guns I needed, then blow them all up with an RPG before they fired a shot. The game lacks a polish, that I feel if I am paying 60$ for, I deserve, so gripe on. The cars look toy-ish, the “pedestrians” are walking zombies with no interaction nor reaction to anything going on around them, the maps are uninspired, and the one thing that kills me is the trees that make me feel like I am in Donkey Kong Country. The controls are sub par at best, aiming is decent once you get the hang of it, and animations are repetitive and “cool”. When you hi-jack a tank the “driver”, the fight he puts up is laughable. And we see that animation, every. Single. Time.

But I digress, the explosion animations are beautiful and the destructible environment is a huge plus. Nothing beats laying waste to baddies to where before the fight a lush forest or wall enclosed base surrounded you at the beginning and once over nothing but rubble and tree stumps lay at your feet. Bad. Ass. The developers wanted a player to be able to use their imaginations and do what ever they want. Want to fly a helicopter, while your buddy is dangling from your winch in a tank firing rounds into a enemy base, hell yea you do! It’s those ideas that I latched onto when the game was getting previewed. But the gamer I am, I have a hard time looking past all the gripes I have to enjoy a game of this nature. I have standards, and for a game like this I had premonitions that needed to be met. GTA4 and Assassins Creed, those are the games in which this game will be measured by. The textures, animations, involvement, layout, graphics, and my biggest peeve…attention to detail. Which is my biggest nit pick. Attention to detail for me in games supersedes a lot of what is listed above. I feel it can make or break a game, little things really do make a difference, and when they go missing and you know there are not there, man does it stand out. Take running over a street light in GTA4, it breaks and sparks spray out. I love it! Or in AC someone sees a fight or dead body, screams ring out and everyone runs for cover. It makes for a more realistic experience. Mercs 2 does not have that, it has “The enemy is here!!” 1,000 times. Their physics engine is great and objects reflect and react to their surroundings perfectly. But you level a 10 story building in front of a sidewalk, or layout 10 dudes with a RPG and bodies go flying, pedestrians just keep strolling along…like nothing has happened. Maybe people in Venezuela really are like that, I don’t know, but not in my mind. Attention to detail people! It’s one of the cornerstones to any great game! Sorry. I’m an ass like that. Deal.

So in closing, rent the game, see what you think. If you can see past many of the glitches and lack of polish, and just want to blow shit up, then I’m sure you will love it. If not, wait till after you have downloaded the November content for GTA4 and played through it, then go to a game store and buy it used, if possible use a trade in game! Discount!
-Dave “The enemy is here!”

Score: C
Verdict: Rent/Buy Used

Holy Shit Batman!

2008-09-10T12:47:00.000-07:00
With all the finesse of drawing a giant dick on the cover of the Little Mermaid VHS cassette, someone at DC let a whole bunch of All Star Batman and Robin the Boy Wonder issue #10 comics get released with some bad words in them.

Never forget issue #2 of all Star Batman and Robin the Boy Wonder.

By the way, in my opinion nothing like this happens by accident, it happened to happen and to sell books. Here are the panels and the omitted text is below. Nothing like this happens by accident.

Hey-- you little CUNT--

FUCK me that little CUNT stole my board!

FUCK you twice, DICKWAD, you let a FUCKing little piece of jailbait

ASS steal your wheels...

...little jailbait CUNT's making us look bad... we cut her come on...

...sweet piece in sweet slices... tasty sliced booty the little CUNT...

And these ASSHOLES make a devil's fortune of it

Text every friend you've got, SHITheads--

Sell your poison somewhere else. This arcade belongs to the

FUCKing Batgirl.

Be sure to check out the link to the original story.

How about a Jedi trick?

2008-09-10T10:39:00.000-07:00

Mark Hamill, the other awesome Joker, will be vocie acting the clown prince of crime in the new Batman: Arkham Aslyum game. Paul Dini is writing it and this certainly won't be the first time Mark Hamill and Dini will be working together.

But hey! This isn't the first time Luke Starkiller has graced the a gaming screen. Wing Commander 3, 4 and 5. Mark Hamill played the hero protagonist, Colonel Christopher Blair. Everyone was in this game, Malcolm McDowell and Jonathan Rhys Davis. Apparently George Lucas must have also been a fan of this game with the way most interiors were shot, all CGI. But hey it is a video game, so it suppose to look like a video game. Oh George. Batman: Arkham Asylum will be out when its done.

I love transvestites and Lego

2008-08-28T08:47:00.000-07:00
Probably the funniest transvestite, Eddy Izzard discusses lunch on the Death Star.

Minifigs how I just want to eat you up and turn a deep shade of blue like the child of an irresopsible parent.

Did the Scifi Channel make Command and Conquer: Red Alert 3?

2008-08-20T14:39:00.000-07:00
With a cast mighty enough to bring basic cable to its knees! The only person missing is William "man-tit Rambo" Forsythe. At least the effects look similar to the old games, and I know that the cut scenes are not the game. I'm not being a cynic, I'm just enjoying the B-movie feel.

Ultra violence to the Wii!

2008-08-20T13:33:00.000-07:00
Sex violence and gore is coming to the family casual game player console console.

Madworld is a Wii exclusive. A stylized black, white and red all over game chock full of fun ways to kill people. Filling the blood lust void that Manhunt 2 was meant to.

House of the Dead: Overkill

Shoot and kill monsters. A formula that has been working for years and years with the HoD series, even as Typing of the Dead (the best learn to type game ever) and the Japanese only English of the Dead.

It makes me smile because both of these titles are being published by Sega, and well nothing is funnier than seeing Sega making violent things for Nintendo. Segavore > Nintedarian.

Some interesting Xbox 360 ports coming this way as well

Dead Rising: Chop Till You Drop which is a port from the 360 game, with some Wii like features. However there is no videos for this game, just some screen shots. Which is all well and good, I mean the game is a few years old now. If you don't know what the game is by now, you have been living under a rock. Dead Rising hopefully this game won't be as brilliantly flawed as the one for the 360.

Onechanbara, which is a port form the Japanese only Xbox 360 game. Zombie killing cowboy bikini girls with swords.

Who watches the SuperFriends?

2008-08-16T07:45:00.000-07:00
When the Watchmen originally came out 400 years ago, "Who watches the Watchmen?" was a phrase emblazoned many DC titles, be it in the corner or on a back page ad. Before viral internet marketing, getting a buzz out was done this way.It was clever and cool. Even later on you might see the phrase in other titles as an homage to the classic book. What does this have to do with the following video? Not very much.

Jonathan Blow makes art and calls it a game!

2008-08-14T08:22:00.000-07:00

Jonathan Blow is someone to like. A handsome man smart man that doesn't appreciate crap. With the success of Braid his first foray into XBL, Johnathan Blow was none too psyched about the constraints that were put on him.

“I put in a tremendous amount of work meeting all these requirements, when I could have put that work into the actual game, and made it even a little more polished, little bit better."

Whatcha gonna do? You made a fun game.

I like this guy for his what seems to be a mantra, "There's not enough innovation in games!"

Check out the GamerChip article and his own website

Braid official site

Iggy Pop! Real life Shenmue!

2008-08-11T07:50:00.000-07:00

Friday I went to Terminal 5 to see Iggy and the Stooges. Prior to this I visited a friend of who lives on Mulberry Street in Chinatown.

Should I be shot for being an Ugly American and combining the experience of going to Chinatown with a friend, who not only lives in Chinatown but is actually Chinese, and the Sega game Shenmue that has a little more than a cult following? Shenmue doesn't even take place in China, it takes place in Japan, and that's not China! However with the inclusion of train rides, purchasing of random items, several bathroom trips, trade and commerce, and ending the night with rock and roll. Friday was the beginning of a point and click adventure brought to life just not as many Quick Time Events. Also there were no sailors to be found anywhere.

So my friend Greyson lives in the truest sense of the word neighborhood of New York City's Chinatown. Being a fan of film noir in Chinatown always servers up images of Triads, awesome hair, hot girls, and yelling. I saw some aspect of most these things. We ate some food at a little place that served us beers and lots of food at a tender price. Fast and easy. My friend Greyson is a generous host and an excellent tour guide. I saw some interesting sites in our 2 block walk.

We saw central booking and the restaurants that are located underneath it. People in Chinatown like to eat. I also bought a belt from a man on Canal Street, this belt cost me three dollars.

The highlight of our 2 block tour was Doyers Street. Doyers Street has sharp 90 degree turn in the road. The nickname, "The Bloody Angle," is not only due to the the lay of the road but to the amount of gang related street violence between 1870 and 1930. I love nick names for places!

Then it became time to go to the show at Terminal 5. A very nice venue, clean, new, three floors and interesting bathrooms. A few days before the show The Stooges had their gear stolen. Part of me thought that maybe they would destroy some of the gear that I assume they rented. This did not happen, which is fine by me. They preformed nothing off the Raw Power album due to some sort of conflict between members of the band.

At Terminal 5 I met up with friends Ron and Joe. We had expensive drinks, not to be unexpected. As I was making my way around the building my phone beeped, and I met up with Lord Russen of Wallington and parts of Garfield. He didn't really like the venue, he prefers more traditional bathrooms. I however am generally more open minded about my bathroom habits. I saw a guy doing whipit hits with a balloon. He was really happy because, "the shit came in the mail today!" Awesome buddy!

Halfway through the set, right about where they did, "No Fun," Iggy invited everyone on stage. Everyone, like Gary Oldman in The Professional kind of everyone. Suddenly this this 60 year old dude that looks like a raisin, but not in a bad way more like one of those tough raisins from Kellogg's Raisin Bran, is dancing with everybody that made it to the stage. The security gave up. Let the people dance! I wish I could dance. Moving and grooving. SHaking and quaking. The music was awesome.

This has nothing to do with Shenmue, but I tried.

Here is the setlist, thanks to Joe.

Loose
1969
I Wanna Be Your Dog
TV Eye
Real Cool Time
No Fun
1970
Skull Ring
Search & Destroy
My Idea of Fun
I Got A Right

ENCORES:
Little Electric Chair
Little Doll
Now I Wanna Be Your Dog (reprise)
I'm Fried